1 Midichlorian Jedi

Since George Lucas decided to ruin the whole concept of the Force in "Star Wars Episode I - The Phantom Menace" with the Stupid Midichlorians, I've decided to create a new Star Wars Character called "1 Midichlorian Jedi". You see the Force is no longer a Universal Field you can learn to tap into through special training. Now, it's just a genetic lottery with the Midichlorians.

Below is a description of the Midichlorians from Wikipedia.

Midi-chlorians (also spelled "midi-clorians" or "midichlorians") are mysterious organisms in the fictional Star Wars universe, first seen in the prequel trilogy. They are microscopic life-forms that reside within the cells of almost all living things and communicate with the Force. Midi-chlorians comprise a collective consciousness and intelligence, forming links between everything living and the Force. They are symbionts with all other living things; that is, without them, life could not exist. The Jedi have learned how to listen to and coordinate the midi-chlorians.

Hey Charles Manson according to the Jedi Geiger Counter(Like the one Qui-Gon Jinn[Liam Neeson] used on Anakin), your Midiclorians are off charts! Do you want to be a Jedi Knight? Better yet, some psycho like Jeff Dahmer could have just ate his way to Jedi Powers by consuming people with Midichlorians.

1 MIDICHLORIAN JEDI CHARACTER DESCRIPTION:

He's a Jedi with just one Midichlorian. So, his Jedi Powers really suck. For example, he mentally strains himself just levitating straws and pushing mosquitoes away. This obviously makes him a big screw up and embarrassment for the Jedi Order. This guys just an all around problem. You don't need Jar Jar Binks around for comic relief with "1 Midichlorian Jedi" on the scene. It's because of 1 Midichlorian Jedi that the Jedi Order now requires a 10 Midichlorian Minumum before excepting applicants for training.

On earth, the lack of Midichlorians also works to your advantage. It's not your fault if you're cretinous, lackadaisical, or untalented. It's because you lack the Midichlorians. There could even be a whole Midichlorian Quota system set up.

By the way, are Pope Benedict XVI and the Supreme Chancellor Palpatine the same guy? They look a like. If Pope Benedict isn't the guy in the movie, he's definitely a Sith Lord on earth. The Pope's got the look for it and the qualifications as a former Hitler Youth member(in his defense he was required to join).

Yeah, I know the Star Wars Saga isn't real, but this Midiclorian thing not only ruined the concept of force ,but it was totally unnecessary to the story. When Darth Vader was bearing down on Luke near the end of the first movie, he said something like, "The force is strong with this one". He didn't pull out a Midichlorian Geiger Counter and say the Midiclorians are strong with this one because it wasn't necessary. The force was something you could sense or acquire through dedication and self development.

Well, if I have to live with the Midichlorians, Lucas you have to live with THE PACKAGE changing your iconic catch phrases. "MAY THE MIDICLHORIANS (Not the Force) BE WITH YOU" If we're going to have this lame concept, I want accuracy.

THE TOTAL MAN PACKAGE!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!